Talking with Governor Schwarzenegger and . . .

I wrote Governor Schwarzenegger and his staff this morning . . . .

It was front page on the New York Times today that California Governor Schwarzenegger is proposing health care reform. Most of us in the business are cynical about the prospects of serious or 'true' reform until the rich start to suffer and die from a deteriorating health care system. Money helps to insulate you from suffering - at least for most people and for awhile. I am not rich but consider myself insulated only because I am a nurse and have health care (only when working).

However this front page news coincided so well that the hospital I work with announced that after 130 years it is closing down by the end of the year. It contracts with the county so that at least 25% of it's business goes to serve the indigent (those poor enough to need the help of others). Of course the hospital loses money and reimbursement is too low to help.

I faxed the governor's office suggesting they somehow capitalize on my communities bad news to drum up support in the legislature to pass health care reform. Doing away with the insurance companies would be a good start, sack them all, cut their pay and let them work with the indigent for awhile to learn and empathize.

Do I expect an answer? No. Do I expect real reform? No. Do I expect to suffer? No. Will others suffer and die from this hospital closing and our inability to act . . . hell yes. I don't know what else to do other than write and offer my help. Write me if you hear of anything good. Till then I am throwing my support toward this plan and against the insurance companies.

Thanks for reading,

David

Dying Days of Rage

I will rage against my dying day,
till the day I can rage no more.
Tis the day I will die I think . . .
the day that rage will live no more.

It is youth that does not know the anguish of growing old
when bones and flesh weaken your resolve.
It only thinks of youthful pleasures,
with no cares for tomorrow.

I hope to accept my death so gracefully,
to welcome it with a lovers embrace, no less.
The pain of unrequited anguish and loss,
will hold no sway nor dominion over me.

It is compassion that will triumph (that is my hope),
I shall save the rage for when it is needed most.
Tis the least of burden's borne,
but when embraced too much . . .
is the heaviest upon one's heart.

David McCullough

Copyright January 7, 2007

I wrote the above late last night or in the wee hours of the morning . . . call it what you may. Many of my patients are older and dealing with the issues of failing bodies and a life that is shorter than longer. So this came to me, as poems often do, seemingly out of nowhere. However, I know that is not true. I am enraged myself at the injustices we all face, not only of growing older but so much else I have written about in the past. I am torn, struggling to accept what cannot be changed versus all the things that should be changed. The old adage of change beginning with yourself is an apt one in this instance. I won't say more here about that in this moment. I get frustrated with myself so much! Lots of talk, no action . . . and I despise that in myself. So many of us know what is right, all the 'shoulds'. I will take action, in some way, somehow, not only for myself but in hope of benefiting others at the same time.

Thanks for reading, be it even one.

David